Last night we went to a Thunder/ Mavs game here in Dallas. We had a lot of fun and these were the highlights:
I texted Jen at like 6:10 last night with something like, “hey, do you want to go to the Mavs Thunder game tonight?” I expected one of the following responses…
“Who are the Mavs?”
“No, tonight I’m introducing you to three new wines I discovered and we’re watching 7 Gilmore Girls episodes”
“I have better things to do than waste my time on sports events”
That’s it, that was my range of expectations.
Instead I got, “Yes, what time are we leaving.”
Not only was I going to get to see my man-crush of 5 years (Kevin Durant) but my wife was willingly subjecting herself to finding a parking spot, scalping tickets, and sitting through 150 minutes of basketball? As the kids these days like to say, boo-yah.
So we made the 6-minute drive to American Airlines Center, couldn’t find parking, and ended up driving around for 20+ minutes looking for a free spot. At this point we’re already 10 minutes late and still don’t have tickets. All I could think was “Durant is probably 7 buckets into a 50-point night and I’m going to miss it.” I was seething. We ended up parking illegally at a bank and I started borderline sprinting for the arena as Jen proceeded to grab my arm with her hand and walk at a pace that would make Betty White look like Usain Bolt. “My hands are cold!” she said, “Durant is playing!” I replied. Marriage! It’s awesome!
We finally arrived at the stadium (after I almost got smoked by an SUV) and Jen even helped me scalp a pair of terrible tickets. Much to my chagrin (and her delight) the game hadn’t even started when we walked through the doors. So we
climbed Everest made our way to our seats and settled in for a fun night of hoops and chatting.
You have to understand, watching a sporting event with Jen is like playing Russian roulette with an encyclopedia — I never really know what she’s thinking or what she’s going to say. Seriously, I’ve heard everything from “that [running back] looks a lot like Zacchaeus” to “seriously Kyle, athletic departments are like the government — they collect all the money made by the football teams and redistribute it to the teams that don’t make any money.” A profound statement for sure, especially coming from someone who, 5 minutes after the game ended last night said, “did we win?”
1. The American Airlines Center is only 5 minutes from where we live. Major score here. It meant no late night driving for Kyle while I sleep in the passenger seat on the way home.
2. I had my first run-in with a scalper. I actually talked back to a guy with a mouth full of solid gold. I have no idea what got into me (the only people I’ve ever talked back to are my parents and my husband), but Kyle’s going to start wearing bulletproof gear when we venture out onto the city streets at night.
3. There were two mass exoduses; one during halftime and one with 5 minutes left. During the first, we looked around and noticed a half-eaten bag of peanuts under the seat above us. We started sneaking them out one at a time, but as time went on, I realized the peanut owner wasn’t coming back. So I snatched the whole bag. This was really fun until Kyle got nervous and started looking around for the police or a lightening bolt. He never does anything wrong. He’s like Tebow. He makes perfectly good peanuts taste like sin.
4. I really loved getting to hang out with my husband. He lets me make fake sports references and people watch all I want, and he even lets me buy cotton candy when I grovel and beg.
I know you’re picturing me twiddling my thumbs and eyeballing peanuts all night, but I really enjoyed watching the game. I even yelled out a “Get the rebound!!!” with 4:34 left in the 4th quarter and threw up a fist pump for a KD dunk.
Cheers and Thunder up!