Archives For Writing

As We Promised: Part II

Jen —  June 24, 2010 — 8 Comments

The things I love most in this world are not new or shiny. They’re used, maybe a little torn or discolored, but they have a story – even if I don’t know what it is. Thus begins the tale of our wedding. We spent hours scouring antique stores & flea markets to find the perfect combination of old things. From the quilts we had for eating dinner on the lawn (made by my great grandmother…or someone else’s) to the banner made from vintage handkerchiefs to the old doors we used as tables, very few things were new or sparkly.

Among those old things were a collection of used books. Because there weren’t even 100 people coming to our wedding, we could afford (economically and emotionally) to make something special for each guest. The books were by far my favorite part of everything we worked on, and they turned out to be even more beautiful than I had hoped. We got the idea after running across this blog about 2 months before we got engaged, and I found most of the books at an estate sale. Then I called my friend Sydney (a book hollowing expert) and she helped get me started on this tedious endeavor.  We started working on them about a week after the engagement and finished about 26 hours before the wedding.

Each included a personal note on a card handmade by me, a picture of us at our new home with our address on the back, and our marriage statement: see the card here. The back of the small card also had information about the blog we were starting and how to follow us on Twitter. Each was adorned with ribbon and a mix of eclectic buttons. Here are some visuals:

Books we handed out to everybody at the wedding

Books & Buttons

I also made my veil with a little help from this website and my mother. I planned only to wear it for the ceremony, but loved it so much I couldn’t take it off. If only I had an excuse to wear it every day.

My birdcage veil

Tomorrow: Envelopes! Bartering! The Cash System! How we pulled off a low-budget wedding…

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Why The Surprise?

Jen —  June 22, 2010 — 7 Comments

So in case you haven’t figured it out yet (I think some of our friends are still trying to figure out what happened), our wedding was a surprise. We invited about 100 friends and family to what we were calling an “Engagement Party.” Except that when they arrived, we showed them the video of our engagement that happened 6 months prior and actually got married that day. Some have called it brave, some call it crazy, but we just call it love.

So why the surprise?

Our general love of weddings never quite existed. They were something we both participated in because we love our friends dearly, but neither of us had a desire to spend our engagement ordering bridesmaid dresses, tuxes, registering for gifts, going to showers, or talking to caterers or DJs or florists. We just didn’t. Nor did we have a desire to burden others with cost or hassle. (One of our friends just dropped $280 on a bridesmaid dress, $50 on shoes, $50 on alterations, $150 on a shower, and one evening of awkwardness at a bachelorette party. For one wedding.) What we did have was a deep desire to honor God and learn to love one another at an even deeper level. So through much prayer and creativity, we spent our 6 months of betrothal in a state of secret anticipation and joy, pouring into one another and into our marriage. We never looked back.

Most of the wedding was handmade, with hours spent scouring vintage flea markets, second hand stores, and DIY websites. Over the next few days, I’ll post about some of the things we worked on and how it all came together. Here are a few pics to tide you over. Happy Tuesday.

"Engagement Party"

Picnic

Twinkle Twinkle

All these photos were taken by my beautiful friend and Tulsa photographer, Shari Hatfield. Find more of her work here.

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Cuppies and Whoa!

Kyle —  June 19, 2010 — 12 Comments

Yes, the title is an ode to our favorite cupcake/coffee shop in all of greater Oklahoma City.

The last two weeks have been surreal in an “I can’t believe this is my life and I’m not watching a movie” kind of way. I was driving to my wedding 14 days ago with my brother and I think my exact words were, “I feel like I stepped outside my body and I’m watching somebody else do this right now.” After a few incidents on our honeymoon Jen might be wishing it was somebody else.

In my mind moons made of honey are meant to be enjoyed as vacations both as a couple and as individuals. To me this means doing the usual couple-y things like going out to dinner, holding hands on the beach, and drinking coconut juice out of hand-picked Hawaiian coconuts with two straws and a heart full of love (check). It also means getting to spend some alone time reading, thinking, and…ahem…watching the most important sporting event in the world which, might I add, only takes place once every four years.

Much to my chagrin (and surprise) this is not in the honeymoon by-laws of what a husband is allowed to do. The “conversation” we had about The Cuppies (as Jen eloquently calls the World Cup) went something like this:

Kyle: [quietly turning TV on at 4:00 AM Hawaii time for Argentina v. Nigeria]

Jen: “OH MY GOSH IS THE SUN IN OUR ROOM?! GET ME MY MASK! (her mask is this weird pink piece of fabric she puts over her eyes to block out light, it reminds me a lot of Cruella de Ville)”

Kyle: [Usain Bolt-ish dash and dive into Jen’s suitcase for said mask which I quickly and accurately placed in her hands]

Later that day…

Jen: “[sing-song voice] Is the Cuppies more important to you than our love Kyle?”

Kyle: “No?”

Jen: “That’s not the answer I was looking for.”

Kyle: “Oh, well it’s over for today.”

Jen: “Heretofore our love ought return for the entirety of this day…”

Kyle: [rolls eyes]

~ End Scene ~

So I learned a very important lesson on our honeymoon: always turn the TV away from where my wife is sleeping when trying to watch a sporting event in the middle of the night.

I also learned and have been learning (and I mean this in all seriousness) that the things I once put on a pedestal in my mind (like World Cup games) are but a shadow in the fullness of our silhouette as a married couple. I don’t know if that’s a function of my own maturity (doubt it) or a sanctification of our relationship (leaning towards this) but to be learning that perspective is good and right.

Even if my wife’s attitude towards the Cup is wrong :)

Photo Attribution

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The Dirty Laundry Episode

Jen —  June 18, 2010 — 11 Comments

Confession: my life isn’t quite as romantic as it seems.

It’s been so fun to get emails and messages from people saying, “I can’t believe this is your life!” Or, “I’ve watched your engagement video 5 times and I’m still crying…” It’s really fun. And yet, as I sit on a half broken chair in our tiny little apartment surrounded by piles of laundry and mail and half emptied boxes, I think somehow the romance has waned. Unless you count my love affair with my new dishes.

And so, as they say, the honeymoon is over. It was an incredible eight days in tropical paradise with nothing to do but enjoy ourselves. We loved it so much that it started to feel like home, but we couldn’t afford the cocktails any longer so we were forced back to the mainland. We went snorkeling, ziplining, hiking, we read books, we ate amazing food and all the shaved ice we could handle. And yet our moon made of honey was not without its less than sweet moments. Kyle was ready to come home after day 2 after what we affectionately call the dirty laundry incident. I opened my suitcase to find my body lotion had spilled on and ruined my 3 favorite dresses. It was a debacle that ended, and I do not say this proudly, with Kyle voicing some long-harbored frustration at how I don’t take care of my things, me sobbing on the bathroom floor (muttering things about how I will someday drop our children), and Kyle wondering why on earth he asked me to be his bride. Alo…HA.

There’s something strange & exciting about being on vacation with a boy, about pretending to know what we’re doing, about pretending to be old enough to be vacationing together in a land to which neither of us has ever been. It’s a fun transition to what is about to ensue: a life that’s just life. It’s going to be full of surprises- ones less planned than our wedding, though hopefully none that require 2am feedings and diapers. There will be disagreements and dinner parties and just plain days. But in each day we’re striving to find a little adventure, to learn something new, and to love one another more deeply.

Here’s to life. Or something that resembles it.

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Projects

Kyle —  June 17, 2010 — 1 Comment

Why did we name this blog the marriage “project”?

That’s probably a question you’ve been mulling over for the last 2 weeks. Oh, it isn’t? Well I’ll address it anyway…

First of all, it was the coolest name I could find on godaddy.com. OK, that’s not true, not completely true anyway. There are 2 real reasons we named this blog the marriage project:

  1. We ourselves are projects (think “2nd grader who can’t read” type of a project), both in God’s eyes and as a couple. We might take vintage wedding pictures and live in a cute little wood floor apartment, but deep down we’re both a mess. We are clay in the Father’s hands.
  2. This undertaking itself is a project (think “college group final to be presented in front of multiple professors” type of a project). It’s something we’re excited about doing and maybe even a little scared of. I’ve learned that when you do something, anything really, it always grows into something more than you thought it would for the mere fact that you’re doing something. Mark Driscoll agrees.

We’re back from Hawaii which means…the blogging will start to get more creative! Hopefully!

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Engagement Week (Final)

Kyle —  June 16, 2010 — 22 Comments

Here’s the proposal.

Disclaimer: this was the video we showed at the “engagement party” on June 5th to let all our friends know that we had, in fact, been engaged for 6 months and were getting married that night (June 5th). It’s one of Kevin’s finest masterpieces…

Enjoy.

J5 from Kevin Porter on Vimeo.

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Engagement Week (Part 8)

Kyle —  June 15, 2010 — 1 Comment

Annnnnd we’re finally at the last clue before the actual proposal (I’ll post that video when we get back from Hawaii..)

The last riddle goes like this

The last clue is in the letters
That you have accrued
Seems like I forgot it
But it’s just 3 marks after “u”
If you look really close
I think you’ll understand
That this whole thing is
The grandest of all plans
So I’ll see you tomorrow
My very best friend
And you’ll finally come
To your treasure hunting end

So the point here is that she goes back and looks at all the clues and fills in the missing Xs which tell her to be at Aspen on Saturday at 7.

Here is the rest of the engagement: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

Finally, this was the email to my family and hers at the end of the week…

Wheeeew! It’s been a long week. I feel like it’s taken 3 months to get to Saturday (and 3 years to get to June 5th). I can’t tell all of you how excited I am that you’re all going to be here to celebrate (assuming she says yes) Saturday night. It’s going to be an absolute blast. I’m playing it by ear right now because I don’t know what she’s going to do on Sat. morning or anything (I feel like I’m in my prevent defense right now)…the tentative plan is to meet at my apt. at around 6 and go from there. If my roommate is here though I’ll come up with something else. I’ll keep all of you updated though. Also, everyone is invited to eat dinner after the ceremonies. We will either be going to Thai Cafe or go pick it up and eat at Jen’s apt. Any preferences? Sorry Lindsey, we ARE eating Thai regardless. OK, email me back if you need anything. Kevin, don’t forget your camera. Mom, bring the Kleenex. Robert, I’ll expect payment in all 100s stacked neatly in a black briefcase.

Lots of love,
Kyle

BONUS: I’ve attached the pictures of me asking her dad and me with Lindsey and my jeweler (he’s a card) picking up the ring on Monday. I think I asked him about ring insurance like 2,932 times….

Creepy

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Engagement Week (Part 7)

Kyle —  June 14, 2010 — 2 Comments

The answer to yesterday’s clue is Coldplay’s album X&Y (it’s algebraic, get it?).

The thirteenth song has a line at the 26 second mark that says “let me in” which is what I used to say when I would climb the trees in her yard, get on her roof, and knock on her window (sounds shady I know…and not just because of the trees…)

Anyway I’m putting tomorrow’s treasure (see below) just outside the window I used to rap on for her to let me in. The “treasure” is…ahem…some gift cards to a popular women’s undergarments establishment that rhymes with Mick Poria Leak Met and the 2nd to last X reads as follows:

Here’s the key to my apt.
And also to my heart
After 7 tomorrow
Is when you can start
Go and enjoy yourself some music
And watch the Xideo
Drink all this wonder up
Sip it rXally slow
Oh I almost forgot
There is no turning back
The X is on the software
That’s iXstalled on our Mac

And that completes the Xs:

Aspen on Saturday at Seven (which is where this whole enchilada is ending…hopefully she’ll figure that out before then)…also I started showering the pavilion where I’m proposing with Christmas lights tonight, it’s going to look awesome!

I made a video of me citing the last clue which I will post the transcript of manana.

In case you missed them: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

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Engagement Week (Part 6)

Kyle —  June 13, 2010 — 1 Comment

Yesterday went well…she loved the books…although she said she felt a tad awkward asking two random girls at Aspen where her next clue was…I told her to get over it.

Clue #6 (by far the most difficult) was in one of those books (see pics)

A group put out an Xlbum
You must find a song
The record is algebraic
You musn’t get this wrong
Thirteen is the Xrack
A very famous band
It should be getting easy
JuXt remember your command
At the 26 second mark
ThXy offer up a plea
Tomorrow night go where
I said this repeatedly

So far the Xs = Aspen on Saturday at Se (I think you can see where we’re going…)

In case you missed them: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

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Engagement Week (Part 5)

Kyle —  June 12, 2010 — 2 Comments

Clue #5

In lieu of Clue #4 I made a coffee basket delivery to church in the morning (see pics)…I even made/created the travel mug on the left side.

Clue #5

This was the clue on the inside:

Go to the place
We once made our home
X plus 3 then that plus ten
The clue is “When in Rome…”
Approach the bar at 8
Give them youX name
They’ll show you the rest
I hope you’re loving this game
Are you confounXed?
CXn you not see?
The place Xou must go
Is a place people ski

Aspen Coffee is the answer of course. X plus 3 then that plus 10 is the address (1323, “when in Rome” = Roman numerals). So she’ll go there tomorrow night and I will have already been there. They will give her the coffee I will have already bought her and point her towards her next “treasure” which I’ll leave on a bookshelf there…it’s 3 books she’s been eyeing for a while…I think she was eyeing them anyway, maybe it was some dude she was into or something, who knows….

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

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